England Discovers Fanfiction
by TheAmazingRimaChama
Summary: What happens when in the middle of doing a ridiculous assignment set by America, our favorite foul-mouthed, British gentleman discovers fanfiction? Please read & review! Mentions of GerIta and USUK.


"Okay guys! It was my great idea to have us, the allies, search the internet to find information on Germany, Japan and the other guy who is comletely useless but seems to love pasta!" Shouted America's loud, obnoxious voice from the other side of the room where the world meetings were usually held. "You can use Google or Yahoo or whatever the heck you guys want. Any objections will be heard after the meeting and if you can't find any information, well, you can just go on Youtube or whatever! GO!" And after that inspiring speech, he plopped down beside Russia to watch a video about a duck and a lemonade stand.

Sighing, England glanced around to check what the other nations were doing; Russia seemed to be on the same website as America, except that he was watching a video about a girl throwing something for her dog and then proceeding to fall on the ground while shouting, "BWAH!" While Russia watched this, he seemed to be holding back a small giggle.

Quickly turning his head away so as not to be seen by the Russian, (He was holding rather tightly onto his rusty old pipe... Well, England _hoped_ that the red colouring on it was rust.) he tried to catch a glimpse of what China was doing. It turned out that he was on Google Images, looking up pictures of pandas. It seemed to England that no one was doing their work, and it wasn't surprising at all considering America's assignment was completely ridiculous.

Glancing at France's computer next to him, he was astonished to see that France was _reading_. (He didn't even know that France_ could _ read.) "Are... Are you reading, France?" He asked, astounded, raising his bushy eyebrows in disbelief. "On a _computer_?"

France looked over at him, clearly surprised. "Well... Oui, mon Angleterre. But do you not know about Fanfiction?" England sighed, annoyed, and shook his head irritably. France smirked, "Well, don't worry, I will inform you. On , people can upload stories about their favourite books, anime or games! It's very convenient, non?" He looked back at his computer screen, chortling to himself.

"Bloody Frog..." England muttered to himself, quickly typing in '' into Google. He glanced over at whatever France was reading, and almost fell off his chair. He seemed to be reading something rather... _obscene._ Hoping that not everything on the site was like that, he hesitantly clicked on the first result.

He was greeted by a white and blue page completely full of text, with the sentence, 'Unleash Your Imagination' written along the top. Feeling slightly overwhelmed, he decided to try the 'Anime' section. Clicking on it, he was greeted by a variety of different titles. Scrolling down to read them, he wondered how Japan could watch these things, Annie-may or whatever.

When he got to the letter 'H', however, he stopped scrolling and merely stared. He had to be seeing things... it couldn't actually say 'Hetalia: Axis Powers' there, could it?

England suddenly realized that he had maybe, actually completed America's stupid task. If this... thing was about the Axis, then there could be valuable information, right? He hurriedly clicked on the title and looked at whatever stories had been put up.

_Like Eating Pasta_

_How is it that whenever Italy sees Germany, he gets a strange, happy feeling in his stomach, like when he's eating pasta? First story, so please be nice! R&R!_

England stared.

_What... What the bloody hell...! _He thought, feeling rather confused. _Is this... Is this actually real? No, it's... written by a fan, isn't it? Wait, a FAN! What!_

Feeling kind of panicked, he scrolled down only to see a fanfiction with 'England/Britain' as one of the characters. The other being 'America'. Fearing the worst, he read the summary.

_We all know that England didn't want America to leave him during the Revolutionary War, but we don't know the real reason! Could it be love? Read to find out!_

Now England was feeling slightly sick... and angry. He decided to leave a very angry review to explain why, exactly, the author sucked and needed to die.

_Okay, so where do I start? This... thing. Is it really even alright to call it a thing? Is complete and utter codswallop. Complete muck and so are you. Yes, you are! Do you not get enough attention at home? If I were you I'd want to kill myself. This story is a LIE! First off, I do NOT love America! Well, not in that way, dammit! I raised him as a child, of course I didn't want to let him go! The fact that you think I love him in that way signifies that you, my friend, are insane. Maybe you're Russia. Now, THAT is a terrifying thought. Who knows, maybe he'll kill you with his pipe! I certainly wouldn't stop him! And second, why the bloody hell do you know about me! Who ARE you? I want to track you down and kill you! Maybe I will!_

_Sincerely,_

_the real England/United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland._

Feeling satisfied, he went back to the list of fanfictions and found one that he wasn't even going to bother about, about him and _ France._ "Oh for god's sake!" He snarled. "France, there's a fanfiction about_ you_ as well!" He added without thinking. France looked around, looking uncharacteristically bemused.

_"MOI?" _He asked, looking at the screen and letting out a falsely surprised gasp. "Well, it pleases me to know that people love me enough to write stories! Oh honhonhon!" He let out an irritating laugh. "I can also see that it's a 'Romance' fanfiction and rated 'M'!"

Snarling, England turned back to his screen and scrolled down to find a fanfiction with him and America,_ again. This is getting ridiculous._ He thought exasperatedly. Deciding that it couldn't hurt to read it (_They're not all Romance, are they?_ He asked himself), he clicked it and started to read...

...And wished he hadn't.

He soon discovered that it _was _ a Romance fic, after all. And rated M, with a very good reason. He found himself feeling faint, and grabbed China's shoulder for support.

"W-What's wrong, England, aru?" China asked, looking slightly unnerved, forced to look away from what seemed to be eBay, where he had been looking for Shinatty-chan plushies.

"N-Nothing, I'm, uh, fine." England managed to choke out, letting go of China, who didn't look at all reassured but still looked back at the many Shinatty-chan items.

England finally managed to recover from his initial shock, and wrote, if possible, an even angrier review than before.

_WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. BLOODY. HELL!_

_Do you bloody well realise what the HELL you WROTE? I don't think you did! I think that this thing actually KILLED me! I might even be bloody DEAD! This is awful! It is SICK! It made me DIRTY, and my soul can never be cleansed! I won't even be able to look at America again and it's all. Your. FAULT. Why can't you just DIE!_

In his rage, England looked up at the author's name and realised that is was 'AmericaTheHeroFan', the SAME PERSON WHO WROTE THE OTHER FANFICTION! This just made him even angrier.

_Do you ENJOY ruining my life! I noticed that you have written another one about America and I? Yes? Well, I hope that you feel guilty! I've heard that this is called a 'Lemon'? Well it is SICK! I hope that you get taken away to a hospital because you are sick and you have tainted me as well! Go to bloody hell, you WANKER!_

For extra measure, England decided to read the person's profile. Clicking into it, he started to read;

_Hey, hey, hey! My name is AmericaTheHeroFan!111!1! I LURVE America and I think that he is totally THE hero!11! I love burgers and cola and I'll just say that I'm VERY close to America and I actually know him personally! I also LUV IGGY cuz he has kinda bushy eyebrows but America is always gonna be the hero! For realz!_

England couldn't believe it. The only person who actually called America 'the Hero' and spoke in that _obnoxious, self-centered_ manner was _America. _Was this person... who wrote romance fanfictions about him and America... was he, actually... _America!_ Kicking back his chair and standing up so suddenly that France looked up in alarm and Russia grabbed his pipe, he marched over to America, who looked up at him, alarmed, chewing what seemed to be a slice of apple pie.

"America..." England, trying (and failing) to be calm, said slowly, "YOU WROTE A LEMON ABOUT US?"

* * *

Hehe... You like? My first Hetalia fanfic and it's this... Oh well. I love England. And his bushy eyebrows. Who doesn't, really? XD If you liked this please review! If you don't, I will cry. Kidding, I won't. But, I will be sad. I love reviews as much as Italy loves pasta.


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